And he was absolutely right, wasn't he? There are only two real differences between these two films, the first being that Transformers is completely lacking in what Twilight was all about: a fucking sexy male lead. Let's face it: in a contest to see who is in more pubescent teenage girls' fantasies, Robert Pattinson would defeat Shia Lebeouf in a crushing victory (while being cheered on by the entire awkward, pimple-covered, bracefaced, and sexually curious 13-year-old demographic to which he appeals so fervently). Shia Labeouf, though attractive, pales in comparison to a guy with pasty skin, fangs, and an eight pack, shameful though it may be.
Very seductive vs. incredibly awkward
(Personally, I think Robert Pattinson looks like the bastard crack baby of Quentin Tarantino.... Does anybody else get that vibe? Think about it)
Ironically, the opposite of this conundrum of hotness is true with the supporting female actresses of these movies. While Kristen Steward is pleasant to look at, and evidently hot enough to fuck Edward Cullen, who would YOU rather get down with, reader? The star of Twilight? Or Megan Fox, Shia's main squeeze in Transformers? (And I say that with every emphasis on the word "squeeze" imaginable)
Okay, stop beating off on Megan Fox's face and let's continue.
The truth is that, no matter which one you think is hotter, all four of these over-advertised puppets are narcissistic hacks who all think they are God's gift to the stage. And their movies, though mildly entertaining, are all garbage. I don't think one of these people have ever been in a movie that had a deeper purpose than to make people believe that high school is actually this interesting, or to CGI blowing shit up, or transforming people to wolves or trucks to robots. It's actually kinda painful to know that these films were successful.
And if you want to know the truth, I'd rather fuck Optimus Prime, but that's just me.
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