Texting is fun, isn’t it? I’m a big drunk texter. Love it. What I really need is like, a rosetta stone that can translate my drunk texts before I send em out. That would super fucking duper. Because I’ll be talking to the girl next day and she’ll be like, “Yeah, uhh, you sent me a text at 3:30 am saying ‘I’m gonna dragon fuck you so hard you’ll cum a fireball.’ You wanna tell me what kind of mid-evil drunken fuckery was going on in your booze head when you sent that?” I’m like, ohh sorry. Looks like I got drunk and watched A Knights tale again.
I always drunk text via iPhone. Aren’t they just a treat?! I feel like when Steve Jobs was a kid he had one of those retardedly overactive imaginations. You remember that kid? Always saying the most ridiculous shit, everyones like “shut up Steve.” He was so that guy. Him and his friends are on the swings at recess, and one of his friends is like, “my dad just spent $200 on a CD player, and now we listen to whatever songs we want. Its so cool”. Then Steve Jobs jumps in like, “Yeah! Well I’m gonna invent a tiny magic rectangle that can have every song ever on it, and its gonna be a phone too, and its a takes pictures. and you can play video games on it, and watch movies, annnd I’m only gonna sell this awesome box for $99.” Steve Jobs you were one retarded little boy. Then the iPhone came out and it turns out his overactive imagination did get the last laugh. Good thing he never got put on Ridelin, or else we would live in a world with no iPod, iPhone, or Mac Book Pro. Thanks retard imagination of Steve Jobs, you’ve made our world that much better.
Friday, November 27, 2009
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