Women

Dustin Conlon
Comedy Blog
Oct 27 /09


Girls are fucking ridiculous. Sure they have to go through “giving birth” and all that good stuff, but that doesn’t give them an excuse for life to just make us fucking miserable 94.6% of the time. (the other 5.4% is during sex or blowjob) And ask anybody, ask even another woman, everybody knows that women have no idea what they want, or how to drive. It all starts in middle school where girls act like, imitate, dress like, and turn their personality into whatever they see on TV or in magazines. They have crushes on boys who if do not reciprocate this feeling, completely ruin their lives, and if they do then that’s too bad because she is already over it and into the guy sitting behind you in art class. Once they hit high school its all over, they like older men, they either turn slutty, geeky, athletic, or stupid. Sometimes it’s a mix between all of the above. It is during this time of high school which they truly peak, or start to climb towards that peak in some cases, and expect even more out of us as men. We are supposed to treat them nicely, but they don’t like that because in reality girls are attracted to men who treat them poorly, its like a challenge for them. But if we treat them poorly we are assholes, and that just isn’t good. We are supposed to know what they are thinking all the time, we are supposed to know what to say, and no matter what in any situation, if a girl is involved, we are completely wrong, no matter what we have to say or think. Another great part about women in high school, is they get all done up, looking very attractive, but we aren’t allowed to look. And the only ones who do allow us to look are the ones who are just plain sluts, and we get made fun of for looking at them anyways. But how is it fair for all the girls to wear push up bra’s that create a cleavage like the grand canyon, then they throw some sparkles and makeup on their tits, and yell at us if we look at them. But then they get depressed if nobody looks at them because that means they aren’t sexy. Once girls reach college, it gets a little better, they figure out what they want a little more, mature a little more, become a little more open to new things, or to old things that were just not comfortable for them. They figure out what they want is everything but nothing, always something else. They mature a little bit by acting mature and then breaking into a little girl at various times. They become a little more open because there is more alcohol in college. And they either want to just have sex, or have already started looking for a husband. But what is the difference right, they don’t know the difference between those two things anyways, and if they did, they in realistically don’t know which one they want.