Halloween Tricks & Treats
So Halloween is just around the corner. And no one loves Halloween like little kids, girls in sluty costumes, and the guys that get to look at those girls. I was unaware how certain girls need to get two entirely separate costumes if they decide to go to two different parties around Halloween. This means they have to think of more creative ways to dress in provocative outfits that attract guys and make other girls jealous. After arriving at the party they notice how “sluty” the other girls look despite complementing them on how cute their costumes are. Then after the countless tasteless sexual innuendos regarding their costume they change into an equally revealing costume for the next night’s function only to endure the same looks and vacant complements. For real, this is what some of these dumb bitches do. As a guy, I could give a fuck less what costume she wears. What really impresses me though is the effort. This retarded ritual is undergone every year despite the fucking freezing cold, creepy dudes, and just plain demented social constructions that make females perform in this bizarre shit. Now I know all girls don’t do this but really hats off to the troopers that make this happen every year. What would the holiday where children dress up to get free candy be without the future wives and moms of America getting half naked in cartoon and literary character inspired costumes? All I have to say is maybe your tits don’t fit in your costume because it is meant for a child.
-Devon Bealick
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